Answers:
Does this rash look infected to you?
There are two signs of infection you should be aware of: the first is a dark
red, blotchy skin appearance around the wound, which will be sensitive to the
touch, and usually will seem to have a burning sensation. The second, is usually
instantaneous death. If the second set of symptoms should occur, lie down and
don't move or you'll start freaking people out. Also do not drive or call old
girlfriends and ask if they're busy next weekend.
Do you think I look fat in this outfit?
Never, ever answer this question. Unless, of course, they do look tremendous.
Then, a simple "LOOK OUT, SHE'S/HE'S GONNA BLOW!" is sufficient. However,
you must be prepared never to see that person ever again. Especially if they
do actually burst from their clothing, possibly blinding you with an errant
button or zipper.
What is 'EINNAR.NET' and why did
I just randomly capitalize it?
EINNAR.NET is a website and forum hosting several groups of people. First and
formost, it contains a forum for friends of mine, their friends, friends friends,
etc..etc... Featuring some of the strangest, hugest, disturbingest, & fetal-position-inducingest
posts ever seen, this dangerous collection of mostly unmoderated forum posts
are perfect for use and abuse. Secondly, it hosts a few online game-playing
guilds from various MMORPGs.
Will EINNAR.NET host information for
me, or my group?
The answer is maybe.. Unless you're able to get me a date with Denise Richards.
Then, the answer is "We're not sure -- we have to think about it."
Sure, the answer would still later be 'maybe' -- but we would then have time
to call all of our friends and tell them that we're going to pick up the phone
and turn down a date with Denise Richards. So -- in a nutshell, the answer is
maybe. Actually, it all depends on "do we know you?"
Who's Denise Richards?
Admit it.. you live in a cave, and have no socialization with the outside world.
She's the woman in 'Starship Troopers,' 'Wild Things' and some other movies
that none of us can remember at this time.
Do You Know the Way To San Jose?
We frequently receive strange questions like this.. Please stop sending questions
like "What's It All About, Alfie?", "How Am I Supposed to Live
Without You?", "Who Can It Be Now?" and -- the last straw: "Do
You Think I'm Sexy?" We have no idea about any of these -- especially for
the person who included a photo with the latter question.
I registered with the forum, but
it won't let me log in?
Most commonly, it means you didn't click on the link that was sent to the email
address you used upon registration. If you used a fake email address, then it
serves you right. If you didn't, then it means (1) there was some major oversight,
and you should email me here so I can look at it, -- or, (2) you don't really
count in our opinion, and we'd like to pretend you don't exist.
Who the hell dresses Stevie Wonder?
Okay. This is a musical question, but it doesn't even pertain to this site.
Try to stay focused. However, to answer your question we have no idea, but we've
ruled out Laura Ashley, Martha Stewart and the Cure's Robert Smith.
Do you believe that existence is
purely happenstance, or do you think we follow a predetermined path?
We here at EINNAR.NET believe that our lives follow a predetermined path, much
like a train carrying explosive cargo along its tracks, carelessly misdirected
into the path of a passenger train by some angry, evil, underpaid rail services
technician. We also believe that in less than one hour the trains will collide
at speeds over 120 MPH – unless Denise Richards/George Bush/Stevie Wonder
(or all of them) can stop them in time using nothing more than a tube top and
tweezers.
Who wrote this FAQ?
I did. (mostly.. kinda...plagarism is a wonderful thing...) Glad we could clear
this one up.
Why do game manuals come in a CD case
now, rather than full sized?
The highly entertaining/flammable manuals are packaged in a CD case for three
reasons: One, it made the manuals easier to store with the CD's they're packaged
with.. Two, no-one really reads them anyway, so why should the game manufacturers
bother to print a big manual. Three, with the huge influx of "game guides"
out there, the manufacturers don't need to try as hard, as you're going to go
out and buy a guide if the manual sucks, or is incomplete.
Where can I find someone who loves me
despite this horrible facial deformity?
Sometimes, finding a person who sees the true inner beauty of another person
is a life-affirming experience. So is winning the lottery. Don’t get your
hopes up, though, unless you win the lottery first. There are plenty of people
out there willing to trade love for money.